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Listening to people describe their initial discovery of FetLife, the social network for those kink facebook in the BDSM lifestyle, is not unlike listening to the newly converted describe their spiritual awakening. When the website launched inmany who had never disclosed their sexual predilections felt free to do so in what they perceived as a digital safe space. FetLife soon became the home for kinky people seeking like-minded friends and partners, local event listings, and a forum to discuss BDSM in non-judgmental spaces.
But as many users learned last February, FetLife was also the home of an unsophisticated code that left its user data vulnerable to collection and re-publication elsewhere. More broadly, the security leak was a reflection of how best practices around safety, privacy, and communication are inconsistently enforced on the site. Of course, Popescu is not a sympathetic character in this story.
While BDSM pops up in mainstream culture from time to time, it still kink facebook largely misunderstood and frequently stigmatized. Simply having a FetLife is not necessarily identifying oneself as a practitioner of BDSM, as the site can be used anonymously with non-identifying addresses and usernames.
But it is still a powerful medium for connection. Facilitating community is a huge service. Ina searchable mirror site of FetLife was created that exposed user dara. Although FetLife CEO John Baku quickly claimed the proxy was blocked in a community post, there was a repeat incident in that exploited kink facebook same fundamental flaw. Flox noted that by failing to be transparent about the issues that come with simply having a FetlifeFetlife makes users believe that security threats are minor and easy for administrators to eliminate.
This reliance on Fetlife means that the company is able to get away with ignoring some community concerns, while selectively enforcing others. One of the ways that they learn about the BDSM lifestyle is through the many forums where posts are moderated inconsistently, revealing a range of abuses of the Community Guidelines.
A search for several racial slurs also turned up posts and groups littered with these terms.
FetLife representatives did not respond to inquiries for comment on this discrepancy. Stryker notes that in the BDSM community, much like society at large, leadership roles are often occupied by people who already possess social power, such as white males. She kink facebook FetLife as culpable in making people feel their information is safer than it is with policies that claim a commitment to privacy.
But mostly, she says, Fetlife is just hoping to make the problem go away. Stryker says that if the website made a concerted effort to create safe spaces for the voices of women, racial minorities, gender non-conforming people, sex workers, and disabled people, Fetlife would be a safer place in general. And Bezreh suggests that BDSM-inclusive sex education and consent education in mainstream curricula would help alleviate the climate of stigma that kink facebook the anxiety of being outed. There is a tendency to accuse people of kink-shaming whenever they suggest that an examination of BDSM practices and other forms or kinky play might be worthwhile.
There is also a tendency to blame individuals for their own privacy violations. The idea that people should just run the risk of having their boundaries crossed and their privacy violated is not just incomplete. It actively stifles the very dialogue about consent, desire, and boundaries that is a source of pride for so many practitioners of BDSM. Alana Massey is writer and editor covering identity, culture, virtue, and vice. Featured Video Hide. Advertisement Hide. Share this article.
Alana Massey Alana Massey is writer and editor covering identity, culture, virtue, and vice.Kink facebook
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